For those of you that don’t know, this is a picture of South station. The biggest train and bus station I have ever seen and it’s right in the heart of Boston. This moment is the first time I’m asking myself if I can remember the first time I was ever at South Station. The answer to that question is no, I don’t remember but this train station holds a special place in my heart, full of some interesting memories. I grew up 20 minutes south of Boston so for any major Boston event we would go to we would take the train. It’s super convenient and Boston is actually known as one of the worst cities for parking. But like I said, I can’t remember the first time but I do remember when I started taking the train by myself I would take the train from the city I lived in to Boston. I had a job in Boston and I was going to modeling school on Saturdays at that time so I came in town often. I loved taking the train. I love people watching. I loved all of it. So I was 16 years old taking the train regularly into Boston for my job at an ice cream shop and my modeling school and that’s when I had met Da. I’ll tell you that story at some point it needs to be told.lol! I guess you’re about to get some of that story now. So I was 16 I had dropped out of high school. I met the love of my life Daniel who was also an entrepreneur of hallucinogenic drugs. If that’s what you call him. Once again, was in love with the man? Or was I in love with the party? I still don’t know. he lived in Maine. I met him when we had gone to Maine for my birthday. I guess I need to tell you at that point in my life I was a teenager who was completely out of control. My parents just didn’t know what to do anymore. I was in a very dark place at that time in my life and leading up to my 16th birthday had attempted suicide many times and at one point landed myself in the ICU and a cardiac unit for a week or two They didn’t want to let me drop out of high school. Or run off to Maine with a drug dealing boyfriend! My stepfather was a principal. My mother was an English teacher they went to church every Sunday, they just desperately didn’t want me to hurt myself or run away and get hurt by someone else. They started going along with the things that kept me content and at that time number one was to let me drop out of high school so I did that then I met Dan that summer. I don’t remember the first time I came up with this idea or who came up with the idea but at some point I wanted to go visit Dan so bad but I had no money. I had no way to get to him, all I had was like $1.50 and it was a little less than that to get to South station so that’s what I did. Once I got to South Station, I needed to find a way to get on a greyhound bus from Boston to Portland Maine, so that I could go see Dan but like I said, I had no money when I got to South station that day I guess this is the part where I let you know I’m really NOT good at NOT getting what I want. I usually find a way to get what I want. So this would be no different. The next thing I remember, I was standing out in front of those front doors of South station and decided that I needed to come up with a story to ask for money. I didn’t want to hold a cup and get pennies. I didn’t wanna wait that long to get on the bus. I can’t remember how much the ticket was. I wanna say I think it was only like $25 but it seems like a lot to me at the time. So I figured I had to come up with a good story and I prepared one in my head and I was approached after making eye contact with a group of construction workers in a very meek voice I asked if there was anyway any of them could please help me. The story that I told them was that I was homeless in Boston and that my brother who was homeless in Texas had been in a near fatal car accident and I needed to get to him but the ticket for the bus was $500, the construction workers kind of chuckled at me and made comments about how it was a great story, but they weren’t interested in giving me their money and this was the first moment I realized I could make myself cry on command. Tears just came rushing out of my eyes, and I said I wish I was lying sir, and a woman who had overheard me telling this whole story came up to me and gave me $50. I know I didn’t stop there and I can’t remember the rest of any of that, but I made plenty of money and I got myself on the bus to Portland and when I got there, my boyfriend and I were able to get a hotel room some pizza, some drinks and some drugs all from my trip to South station. So it began I dated Daniel Perry for a couple years after that and this was how I went back-and-forth I would get just enough money to get myself to south station and once I got to south station, I would come up with these crazy stories make friends talk to random strangers and get these people to help me. Now I hate to say it and it feels bad that they gave me money under false pretenses, but I was young dumb naïve and ultimately I forgive myself.
Side note, before all of this was another epic moment at South station if you read my post entitled ‘Truckin’, you would have read that that was where we ended up after we ran away when we got to South station we found my parents Police and all kinds of posters of us, lol I was 15 at that time.
So that’s how it started my desire to see the love of my life at the time caused me to go on these adventures.
OK, I have to tell you I made many interesting acquaintances while traveling back-and-forth from Boston to Portland, Maine, which I did very regularly for a few years one day I was on my way home from Maine back to Boston. I may or may not have been under the influence of good amount of Hallucinogenics in this story, not sure it’s all a blur lol! I say that because in my memory of this story, I felt that I had it all together, but there is a small possibility that that was not the reality at all! My perception might be a little jaded. Anyway, this is the story about the orange guy. I will never forget this story. So…I’m sitting on the Greyhound bus on our way from Portland, Maine back to Boston. I’m sitting next to this man who is wearing a nice long wool coat like a dress coat he wearing a suit and he was eating an orange. We were talking. God only knows what I was saying I don’t remember lol but I remember this… at one point he told me that he quit drinking because drinking was just causing problems for him creating pain and he had to stop but he had such a hard time stopping! He figured he would have to replace the alcohol with something so that’s when he started eating oranges and every time he wanted a drink, he would eat an orange instead , as he’s telling me, he looks at me with the orange in his hand and said “I eat a lot of oranges”
And here’s another random thought are these actually interesting stories or am I just so easily entertained that I make stories out of nothing???
OK anyways……
At that time I was traveling back-and-forth from Boston to Maine. I would just leave the house and not tell my parents where I was going. They knew I was going to see Dan, but they were no cell phones back then I can’t imagine being in my parents position, but I would go stay with him for, as long as it worked out until we started fighting or until we were broke or whatever it was and then I would come home and stay home for a week or so before I would go back. I did tell you I will tell you the Dan story at some point but like I said he was my first true love. He also happened to deal paper acid so in the first nine months that we were together, I spent the majority of my time eating paper acid, and when I would come back to Boston for a week or so, to be with my family, he would send me back with plenty of acid for myself for the period of time we were apart. I was pretty much tripping for nine months straight and the beginning of our relationship and I was running. I wasn’t exactly running away because my parents really had no control over when I came or left, but in my heart and in my mind, it felt like I was running away. One of those rides from Portland back to Boston. I heard this song ‘against the wind’ by Bob Sefer. For those that don’t know this song here are the lyrics that I love about this song
“The years rolled slowly past, and I found myself alone surrounded by strangers I thought were my friends I found myself further and further from my home and I guess I lost my way. There were oh so many roads I was living to run and running to live never worried about paying or even how much I owed moving 8 miles a minute for months at a time breaking all of the rules that would bend I began to find myself searching, searching for shelter again and again against the wind a little something against the wind, I found seeking shelter against the wind
Against the wind, I’m still running against the wind. I’m older now, but still running against the wind.”
I’ll never forget listening to that song on the bus that day I must’ve only been 16 years old and I felt that song in my heart already, but I knew I was so young and had so much more life to live, but I also knew my heart would always be able to relate to that song. And that is absolutely still true.
There’s a lot of south station stories and I’m sure I’ve seen a lot more than I would ever be able to remember to tell you, but this story is what came out today.
And yes, still running against the wind. I’ve always been a runner, but that’s OK.
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